From Pillow Princess To The Wolf Queen

With Dan, and experimenting with others, my sexual training wheels finally fell off and I have newfound confidence in the bedroom.

“One man’s porn is another man’s instructional video.”

You’re a Wolf…

A few months after coming out, I tried the Scruff app. I flirted but didn’t send explicit photos; just my profile picture. I only met one guy in person who seemed surprised I suggested coffee first.

When he arrived at Starbucks, it was all pleasantries and smiles. I thought, “This is what it means when they don’t look like their photo from 20 years ago.” Still, he was handsome. After the initial banter, he said, “You’re a wolf.”

I’d only been called a wolf in sheep’s clothing by very conservative Christians who despise me now for being gay, so I thought it was an insult. With a quizzical look, I asked, “Like a ‘wolf in sheep’s clothing’?”

He said, “No! I mean sexy and aggressive… and I’m ready to be stalked!” I laughed and we had a good conversation (no sex). I let my prey go for another day and went our separate ways.

I didn’t mean to have three rhyming words in that last sentence. It’s still cool though.

Over the years, I’ve been called a “wolf” in a sexual context by different people. I think they saw something in me that I didn’t realize: healthy aggression/assertiveness.

When I first came out and started dating, I had a pretty good idea of what I liked in a man, about men, and what I enjoy doing while rolling around with them :). I was surprised to learn I still had training wheels on even after marrying Dan. He was very happy when I let him take those off.

Then the Sexplorations started and I learned to howl. Or something similar ;). One of the first things I learned is aggression/assertiveness in the bedroom is…