The Spiritual Bypass
The Danger of Spiritual Maturity vs. A Holistic Maturation Process
“They (those who consider themselves spiritually mature) might assume their spiritual status excuses or transcends their personal shortcomings. This creates a kind of spiritual bypass—where faith becomes a way to avoid real growth instead of catalyzing it.
“Spiritual maturity” is tossed around in religious circles as a pathway to righteousness and wisdom; that phrase is especially prevalent in para-church ministries that have a specific theological focus. It’s typically meant to describe someone who is perceived as wise and knowledgeable in the faith/practice, as well as steady in their beliefs and worldview. But there are dangers that can manifest when spiritual maturity begins to outpace emotional, relational, or psychological maturity—what we might call “holistic” maturity.
Spiritual maturity can look impressive on the surface. A person may quote sacred texts fluently, lead others in prayer, and exude confidence in their spiritual convictions. But if they lack basic empathy, humility, or the ability to navigate interpersonal conflict, their spiritual insight can become more of a mask than a manifestation of inner growth.
Don’t get me wrong, spiritual maturity IS good for those that seek it in a balanced and healthy (holisitic) way. It’s very not good when it is performative and dictated by others. Here’s why…
The Spiritual Bypass
Spiritual systems often reward visible signs of spiritual development—discipline, knowledge, leadership roles—while more subtle traits like self-awareness, emotional regulation, and vulnerability can go unnoticed or even be discouraged. It’s possible to climb the spiritual ladder without ever dealing with your insecurities, ego, or relational wounds. This is *very* true for me in my past as a ministry leader.
In fact, spiritual growth sets an ambiguous, or sometimes unobtainable, goal that can be easily manipulated when defined by others; as a result it can make someone less open to self-examination. They might assume their spiritual status excuses or transcends their personal shortcomings. This creates a kind of spiritual bypass—where faith becomes a way to avoid real growth instead of catalyzing it.
The Consequences
The results can be harmful, especially in communities that place people with “spiritual authority” on pedestals. When leaders or practitioners lack emotional intelligence or fail to take responsibility for their actions, they can end up hurting others while remaining blind to their own faults. And because they’ve been labeled “spiritually mature,” they’re often shielded from accountability.
And that, brings up a whole lot of painful memories.
For individuals, this imbalance can cause inner conflict: struggling with anxiety, anger, or control issues while feeling like they shouldn’t because they’re “spiritually strong.” They might begin to suppress rather than explore, pretend rather than process.
What True Maturity Looks Like
True maturity—spiritual or otherwise—is integrated. It doesn’t ignore emotional health, psychological self-awareness, or honest self-reflection. It’s rooted not just in what you know or believe, but in how you live and relate.
You can measure spiritual maturity not by how often someone prays or how much doctrine they can recite, but by how kindly they treat others, how they handle conflict, and whether they take ownership of their mistakes.
The path forward is not to reject spiritual growth, but to bring it into conversation with the full spectrum of what it means to be human. Maturity—real maturity—isn’t about appearing enlightened. It’s about becoming whole.
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